Choosing One's Way, Attitude, Meaning - & ultimately, Wisdom over Suffering

     “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

     "We can discover meaning in life in three different ways:      
     1) by creating a work or doing a deed; 
     2) by experiencing something or encountering someone; and 
     3) by the attitude we take toward unavoidable suffering."           Viktor Frankl MD

     Without wisdom, life IS suffering - at least according to Buddhist psychology.

     "In 1950, the psychoanalyst Erik H. Erikson, in a famous treatise on the phases of life development, identified wisdom as a likely, but not inevitable, byproduct of growing older. Wisdom arose, he suggested, during the eighth and final stage of psychosocial development, which he described as 'ego integrity versus despair.' If an individual had achieved enough 'ego integrity' over the course of a lifetime, then the imminent approach of infirmity & death would be accompanied by the virtue of wisdom."           Stephen S. Hall
       http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/06/magazine/06Wisdom-t.html?_r=0 

There is a way out

What Really Matters?

     "transcendence, enhanced meaning, hope, and a sense of being connected to something greater and more enduring than the self may significantly influence quality of life (QOL) by lifting one above despair and reducing, or even completely eliminating, one's suffering. Conversely, uncertainty, fear, and an experience of loss of control may amplify suffering even in the absence of physical distress. If we are body, mind, and spirit (however understood), these elements are both inseparable and interdependent, and their mix of influences consistently modifies all experience of health and illness. Nevertheless, such issues are largely ignored in the current science-based, disease-oriented paradigm."
       Mount B. Healing, quality of life, and the need for a paradigm shift in health care. J Palliat Care 2013; 29(1): 45-8.

     Normal human maturation naturally leads towards wisdom, and thus to experiencing transcendence, meaning, & a profound sense of connectedness or unity. However, this healthy developmental trajectory is easily arrested or derailed by existential angst, and it's manifestations: materialism, cynicism, workaholism, etc.
     Our personal, our families', as well as our patients' QOL would all greatly benefit if we more carefully nurtured our personal maturation.

Martha on her path

Capacity to Embrace Suffering with Equanimity

     The statement below applies equally to all modern health-care professionals as well as traditional healers and shamans: 
     “Teaching Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) requires the capacity (- the heart -) to meet our own suffering and that of others with attention, resilience, transparency, and compassion. For most people, cultivating these qualities is both cumulative and non-linear.”
http://www.umassmed.edu/cfm/oasis/index.aspx?linkidentifier=id&itemid=41256

     “Most of us recognize that we human beings may or may not act in a manner that corresponds with what we say our ethics are. But human beings do act in ways that are congruent with what they ultimately trust as dependable and real – what makes sense at the end of the day, what they think they can really count on. We humans act in ways that are congruent with how we make meaning.
     We human beings seem unable to survive, and certainly cannot thrive, unless we can make meaning. We need to be able to make some sort of sense out of things; we seek pattern, order, coherence, and relation in the disparate elements of our experience. If life is perceived as only fragmented and chaotic, we suffer confusion, distress, stagnation, and finally despair.”
     Parks SD. Big questions, worthy dreams. Mentoring young adults in their search for meaning, purpose, and faith. John Wiley & Sons, San Francisco, 2000.

       See also: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/07/361-beyond-stress-management-resilience.html
     and: http://healthyhealers.blogspot.ca/2013/06/heart-ensures-you-thrive-not-merely.html
     and: http://mindfulnessforeveryone.blogspot.ca/2013/06/347-training-in-equanimity.html

Laszlo "Les" Lovas   (1915 - 2001)   Self-portrait

Aging Wisely

     “Aging is inevitable; becoming wiser with age is not. Researchers, theorists, and clinicians have noted that older adults approach their lives in one of two ways: Either they draw on their strengths and live life to the fullest, or they magnify their weaknesses and restrict their lives to succumb to life’s inevitable end.

     Rigidity is a tendency to resist change, while flexibility is the ability to adapt to change.

     The conscious aging theory espouses late life as a period of deeper meaning and personal growth.

     As long as one remains engaged late in life, personality continues to develop.

     One’s sense of self changes as one negotiates the conflicts proposed at each stage (of psychological development). The conflict assigned to ‘old age’ is that of integrity versus despair.” 

     Giblin JC. "Successful aging: choosing wisdom over despair." J Psychosoc Nurs Ment Health Serv 2011; 49(3): 23-6.

     Pema Chodron's perspective: http://www.johnlovas.com/2013/06/porousness-heart-opening-stepping-into.html

Artist: John Ackerson   http://johnackerson1.blogspot.com/