Skimming the surface

     How many times have I bought a book, put it on my shelf, but never got the chance to read it. Nevertheless, there's a misguided sense of ownership of the contents by virtue of buying it.

     How about buying the gear for an activity that sounds like fun, but which one never even begins to do eg fly fishing. Or buying a gym membership, but using it maybe once.

     We seem to live in an age where information, activities, clothing, food, geographic locations, even secrets of the world's wisdom traditions are all readily available. We're drowning in choice, but we flail like a drowning person on the surface of things. Have we lost the ability to dive deeply, immersing ourselves in a single activity? Perhaps we fear that we'll become out of touch, idiot savants, unless we keep up with constant newsfeeds, tweets, emails etc?

     “So long as one is merely on the surface of things, they are always imperfect, unsatisfactory, incomplete. Penetrate into the substance and everything is perfect, complete, whole.” 
        Kapleau P. “The Zen of Living and Dying. A Practical and Spiritual Guide.” Shambhala, Boston, 1998.

Photo: Colin Bates   http://www.coastalimageworks.com/

Existential resilience

     “Obviously, it would be wonderful to have a way to deal with all kinds of experiences: sorrow, mystery, happiness, and ecstasy. Our lives would be transformed if we could learn to heal and to withstand sorrow better, to uncover meaning in the midst of mystery, to cultivate happiness, and to invite ecstasy. Fortunately, these are the goals of spiritual practices, and these practices offer a life-changing feast of benefits.” 

     “The word religion has many meanings; in particular it implies a concern with the sacred and supreme values of life. The term spirituality, on the other hand, refers to direct experience of the sacred. Spiritual practices are those that help us experience the sacred – that which is most central and essential to our lives – for ourselves.” 
        Walsh R. “Essential spirituality. The 7 central practices to awaken heart and mind.” John Wiley & Sons Inc, NY, 1999. 

"The wisdom of no escape"

     Most of us realize that the problem-solving approach Arnold Schwarzenegger used in his movies was meant to be comedic. "The war to end all wars" (WW I) didn't. And yet, the public continues to support equally useless wars on drugs, terrorism, crime ...

     To (attempt to) eradicate something, it's first demonized - made utterly hateful AND foreign to ourselves individually and collectively to "our tribe", then it's fine to swat it like a mosquito. It's awkward of course when "one of our own" commits a reprehensible act - then we have to "disown" the unfortunate - an outcast, left behind to fend for himself in the wilderness. Most awkward is when we ourselves mess up! Then we have to disown the act - through lying, denial, repression, suppression, avoidance, temporary insanity ... "The system" or one's parents are also handy targets to deflect the blame.

     We each have to take personal responsibility - start looking at our self deeply and honestly. What is our role in this mess? This is infinitely more complex and challenging than diagnosing and treating patients' physical illnesses. Most of us have minimal training in psychosocial matters, and deep self-reflection is uncharted territory for us. Nevertheless, if we wish to fully engage the complexity of our single, short, precious life, then it's worth really serious effort.

     A personal / professional "shipwreck" can suddenly force this inward journey. For this liminal experience to be a productive growth experience, for externally-oriented perfectionists, it's a really good idea to have professional guidance. In Nova Scotia, we have a free, confidential Professionals' Support Program for dentists, physicians and veterinarians, operated by Doctors Nova Scotia. The two fine people behind it are:

Tracy Scott MD  and  Carolyn Thomson MD
Confidential help line: 902-468-8215
E-mail: professionalsupport@doctorsns.com

        Title of today's blog is from the excellent book:         Chodron P. “The Wisdom of No Escape.” Shambhala, Boston, 1991.  

Ethics - black & white??

     Investment advisers, CEOs, clergy, politicians, lawyers, accountants, police, and yes - health-care professionals - lie, cheat, steal, engage in every conceivable means of betraying the public's trust. A real earth-shaker in my area of professional interest was the Sudbø case (below).

     "A stunning admission of fraud from a respected Norwegian oral cancer researcher, Jon Sudbø, M.D., Ph.D., D.D.S., has left the cancer research community reeling. According to statements from his hospital and his attorney, Sudbø fabricated data for 900 patients in a study published in October in The Lancet, which has now retracted the article. He also 'fundamentally mishandled' data for a 2001 article in The New England Journal of Medicine and a 2005 article in Journal of Clinical Oncology.

      Eva Szabo, M.D., who oversees prevention trials for upper aerodigestive cancers at NCI, said in a statement that the institute is reviewing 'the entire portfolio' of oral cancer grants to see which others, if any, drew scientific justification from Sudbø's fabrications. ..."                   http://jnci.oxfordjournals.org/content/98/6/374.full

     Even the liberals among us tend to morph into hanging judges when it comes to serious breaches in medical ethics. We're disgusted and firmly feel that we could never do that! Short of capital punishment, we really want to distance ourselves from such depravity as definitively as possible.

     The problem is that we can't. We are not qualitatively different from these "perps." Each of us has the potential to do anything - from unimaginably horrible to unimaginably wonderful - given the wrong / right circumstances. If we suppress and deny our "dark side," it's much more likely to bubble up as unethical behavior. Health-care professionals tend to be more outwardly oriented than introspective - a real handicap!

         Ethical breaches are disgusting, should bring severe penalties, BUT perpetrators are one of us fallible, at times horrible & idiotic, always fragile, immature yet ever-so-slowly maturing, wonderful creatures.

     “Be kind, everyone is carrying a heavy load.”       Anon

Photo: Colin Bates   http://www.coastalimageworks.com/

 

Healing

     “... an interesting story about how a famous psychologist in Japan cured a young girl after she suffered a nervous breakdown. The girl was from a wealthy family, and the psychologist met her regularly. But he didn’t do or say anything. He just sat with her. One day, as he was sitting with her, the girl peed on the floor right in front of him. He was a very neat gentleman, and he was dressed in a very fine suit. But the moment she did this, he immediately took the beautiful handkerchief from his breast pocket and, without comment, cleaned up after her.

     In time she completely recovered. She later recalled this incident, because she was very impressed by the psychologist’s actions that day. Without any hesitation, he just mopped the floor with his fresh, neat handkerchief. There is no way to explain why she recovered. He didn’t do anything. He only cleaned up after her during this one incident. But she could feel something very soft, gentle, and magnanimous coming from each pore of his body. She really respected him.

     Have you ever met such a person? The moment you meet such people you feel relief just by their presence or their smile. Such people actually do exist in the world. How can we cultivate and nurture this kind of character in ourselves? It is not done through any intellectual process."

     Katagiri D. “You have to say something. Manifesting Zen insight.” Shambhala, Boston, 1998. 

Photo: Colin Bates   http://www.coastalimageworks.com/

CEO syndrome

     Few of us will ever reap the rewards of being actual CEOs - sky-high income, jet-setting lifestyle, prestige. 

     Nevertheless, an alarmingly high proportion of us chose to take on the air of dysfunctional CEOs - harried busy behavior, doing a poor superficial job of projects we've committed to, obsessive cell phone use - an overall lack of caring, balance, focus, priorities, quality of life. 

     "I'm busier than you" and it's variants are common pleas for respect. However, when people we depend on repeatedly fail to deliver, CEO-type excuses become difficult to tolerate.

     We depend on each other completely to do our assigned tasks very well, with great integrity. Civilization depends entirely on each person's civility - like an animal depends on the healthy function of each cell in its body. ALL of us need to fulfill our responsibilities to each other - to life.
     This includes even the smallest aspects of our lives - like throwing trash INTO - instead of beside - the garbage pail, even though there are cleaners for public washrooms. We each OWE civility towards others who use the washroom, as well as the cleaning staff. How we behave, especially when no one can see, accurately reflects our self-esteem - to upgrade the latter, upgrade the former!

Photo: Meowr   www.dpreview.com

Blind Spots - Common & Normal

     Years ago, while driving in heavy Toronto traffic, I looked in the side mirror and without turning to look directly, I quickly switched into the lane to my right. In the process, I cut off a (marked) police car and scared the heck out of one of the policemen. Obviously I had not seen them - they were in my "blind spot." Of course I would have seen them, had I appropriately turned to look directly.

     How many times have we done regrettable things and wondered "What was I thinking?" We now clearly see what was invisible to us then. Most of these blind spots are developmental-stage dependent. We were simply too "young, dumb, and (possibly) full of rum".

     It's so important to realize that we have a huge potential for continued growth as human beings. If we must define ourselves, can it be as a "work-in-progress" or perhaps a verb instead of a noun? Instead of having simplistic "premature closure" about infinitely complex, fluid, ever-changing reality, can we not instead wonder about the mystery of "Who am I?" and "What is this?"

     Our life is "a complex process that includes changes in biological, cognitive, emotional, social, spiritual, and moral dimensions.”

       Parks SD. “Big questions, worthy dreams. Mentoring young adults in their search for meaning, purpose, and faith.” John Wiley & Sons, San Francisco, 2000.

 

Photo: eric87   www.dpreview.com